I Can See for Miles Read online

  “Fuck, Charlie, I’m so ready… please… inside me, now, please.”

  Charlie slowly slid into Josh up to the hilt. The growl that fell from his lips was almost feral as he felt himself surrounded by nothing but Josh, and he closed his eyes, breathing deeply and trying to hang onto the orgasm already tingling in his spine. The noises Josh made beneath him and the feel of being sheathed in tight heat were already pushing him to the edge. Reaching around with a strong, muscled forearm, Charlie held Josh across his chest and lifted him so he was raised on his knees, his back against Charlie’s chest. He lifted Josh’s free hand and wrapped it around the back of his neck, kissing the curve of Josh’s jaw when his head fell onto Charlie’s shoulder, his eyes tightly closed. Sliding a hand up Josh’s chest and closing his fingers around Josh’s chin, Charlie turned him to kiss Josh’s parted lips and slip his tongue into Josh’s mouth at the same pace as he was rolling his hips up into Josh’s hot channel. It wasn’t the most coordinated kiss he’d ever had, but it was wonderful. “Fuck, Josh,” he breathed against Josh’s lips. “You’re so fucking tight… feels so good.” Josh’s back arched against Charlie as he pounded into him relentlessly, knowing he was hitting that sweet spot deep inside when the timbre of Josh’s voice changed.

  “Charlie… deeper… harder… oh fuck,” he babbled, dragging his lips from Charlie’s to bury his face in the crook of Charlie’s neck. “I gotta come… please, baby… tell me I can come….”

  Charlie was so close. The effect Josh had on him was something he had never experienced with anyone, including Brian. Josh made him lose control almost from the first moment he buried himself inside him. He was overwhelmed with the desire to reduce Josh to a babbling, incoherent mess of passion and lust and need. A need only Charlie could satisfy… as only Josh could satisfy the need deep inside him. “Okay, baby,” he hissed into Josh’s ear, his hips still thrusting deep and hard. “Let go, Josh… let go…. I’m gonna make you come. Just feel my cock riding you hard and fast, baby. Can you feel it? Dragging over that sweet spot… making you see sparks… can you see them, Josh… can you see them?”

  “Oh fuck, Charlie… I can see them. With you inside me, I can see everything,” Josh whimpered. Lifting his other hand, he clasped both of them around the back of Charlie’s neck and hung on for dear life as Charlie thrust relentlessly. “Charlie… I’m gonna come… holy fuckin’ shit… I’m falling, baby… I’m falling.”

  “Do it, Josh… do it… wanna feel you come… wanna hear you… oh shit, Josh,” Charlie groaned harshly into Josh’s hair, his hips stuttering as the wave of his orgasm lifted him high. Charlie cried out when he felt Josh’s ass clamp down on him as the other man’s orgasm hit him, fast and hard. Pulsing hot bursts as his release flowed from him into Josh, Charlie’s breath fell from his lips in harsh gasps as Josh’s seed hit his forearms where they were wrapped around Josh’s chest. “Fuck, Josh… oh my God….” Charlie kept his face buried in Josh’s hair as the aftershocks of his orgasm flowed through him. He didn’t think he had ever come so hard or so long in his life. The emotions washing over him were so overwhelming he didn’t know what to think or how to feel. It was too much all at once for his brain to process.

  “Charlie,” Josh panted, “oxygen kinda important.”

  “God… sorry, baby,” Charlie apologized and with gentle hands eased Josh forward so he could withdraw. He pressed kisses in between Josh’s shoulder blades at the other man’s hiss when he pulled out, and Josh collapsed forward onto his hands, lowered himself down onto the blanket, and buried his face in the crook of his elbow.

  Quickly dealing with the condom, Charlie grabbed some napkins out of the backpack and urged Josh to turn over so he could clean him off. He looked down at Josh, noting the twitching of his abs as if his orgasm was still pulsing through him gently, and frowned slightly at the arm hiding Josh’s face from him. “Josh? Are you okay?” he whispered, lying down beside Josh and resting his head on his hand. Josh nodded, but Charlie’s concern deepened. “Josh… gonna need words, baby.”

  “I’m okay,” Josh rasped in a voice that didn’t even sound like his own. “It was just so much… you know. I can’t explain it.”

  “I know, baby, I know.” Charlie smiled softly and leaned down to kiss Josh tenderly. “I felt it too.” He sighed and brushed Josh’s hair from his eyes. “Where the hell did you come from?” His voice was filled with awe.

  “Texas,” Josh deadpanned, chuckling when Charlie grabbed his hand and nipped at the pad of his thumb.

  “Very funny, dumbass.” Stretching, Charlie picked up his glasses and pushed them onto the bridge of his nose. “We’d better get you back to the cabin. The temperature’s starting to drop.” He handed Josh his clothes and quickly got into his own before packing everything back into the backpack. After padding across the grass, he hooked the bag over Dottie’s saddle and then folded up the blanket and laid it across the horse’s neck.

  “Hold on… I need to take a piss,” Josh said, holding his arms above his head and stretching with a loud groan. “Can you give me a hand?”

  “Oh… sure,” Charlie said, walking over to him to pop the button on Josh’s jeans.

  “Charlie… what are you doing?”

  “Giving you a hand….” Charlie trailed off at the laughter in Josh’s eyes. “What?”

  “I meant can you give me a hand behind a tree, numb-nuts. I can manage the peeing by myself. Besides, if you give me that kind of a hand, I don’t see us leaving any time soon.”

  Charlie was glad Josh couldn’t see the particular shade of puce his face must be and gave Josh his elbow, guided him over to a set of bushes, and gave him quick instructions on the surrounding foliage. “Be careful, there’s some poison oak there. I don’t want you marking up that beautiful ass—that’s my job.”

  “Ooh, kinky,” Josh scoffed, waiting until Charlie walked away.

  Charlie leaned against Dottie’s warm body, feeling the chill in the air as the wind picked up, and waited for Josh to finish answering his call of nature. “Come on, Josh…. I think we’re in for a storm. Clouds are coming in, and the wind’s cutting through my shirt.”

  “I’m coming…. First you’re afraid of a tiny Texan, now you’re complaining about a little breeze. Jeez, you sure you’re not the girl?” Josh drawled, his voice coming nearer.

  “Very funny. You’re the one with girl hair.”

  “How many steps to the left?” Josh called.

  “Nine,” Charlie replied, raising his voice over the whistling wind. What? Left? “Wait, Josh…. RIGHT, not left… nine steps RIGHT!”

  “Charlie!”

  Charlie’s blood felt like ice water in his veins when he heard Josh shout his name on a gasped breath, followed by the sound of a loud splash as he fell in the river. “Josh!”

  Chapter Eleven

  FINGERS scrabbling for the pager in his pocket, Charlie ran to the riverbank screaming Josh’s name over and over again. After punching in 911, Charlie dropped the pager on the ground and looked helplessly into the black-as-pitch water of the river. He couldn’t see Josh. He couldn’t see anything. His diminishing vision combined with the darkness surrounding them meant he might as well be blind already.

  “Josh!” he screamed, ripping off his boots and jacket and the stepping down into the rushing water. He knew when you got about three feet in, the riverbed dropped by about twelve feet. Once you hit that point in the river, the current picked up speed to carry you downstream. He just hoped Josh had managed to grab on to something before he got out that far. His mind was racing, and his fear was suffocating. He knew how scared of the water Josh was—knew the reason for his fear—knew how Josh had panicked at the mere thought of going near the water.

  “Jesus,” he hissed as he peered into the darkness and felt the cold water plastering his jeans to his skin. “Josh, can you hear me!” Trying desperately to block out the pounding of his own heart, Charlie strained to listen for a response above the now howling wind
whipping up the river around him. “Baby, please… where are you?” He startled as a rumble of thunder echoed around him, and he felt the first spatter of rain on his face. “Josh, please answer me!” he screamed, hearing the crack in his voice as he tried to hold it together and remember the training he’d had for an emergency such as this. But the only thing echoing in his brain was Josh’s name. “Please be on your way, guys. Please be on your way,” he whispered, wading further out into the water.

  Each pager had a microscopic GPS chip inside, so whoever punched in 911, the location could be pinpointed by any one of the other guides. They were all fully trained, but it would take at least ten minutes for anyone to reach him, because they would have to come on the dirt bikes—it would take twenty by horseback. Charlie would have to find Josh and keep him alive until help got there.

  Charlie squinted as a fork of lightning lit the sky and illuminated the water. “Josh!” He could just make out a shape hanging onto a fallen tree in the middle of the river, about two hundred yards. It wasn’t moving. Charlie could only pray it was Josh and hope he hadn’t responded because he couldn’t hear Charlie calling above the growling wind and not for any other reason. “Shit! Josh, hold on, baby…. I’m coming!” He tried to judge how far he was from the bank and when he would reach deeper water, but he was about a foot out, and he swallowed what felt like half the river as he slipped under the water.

  When he resurfaced, his glasses were gone, and he pushed his hair from his eyes, whipping his head back and forth to try and gauge where he was. It was practically impossible. All he could see were shadows. He paddled in the water, feeling the current grabbing at his legs and praying there would be another flash of lightning to help him see more than the hand in front of his face. You fucking idiot, Cooper! If anything happens to him, it’s your fault! How could you let him bring you out here in the dark? Why didn’t you tell him? Congratulations—your stupid fucking pride has finally gotten you something—it’s gotten Josh killed! The thoughts chased each other around Charlie’s head as he swam a few feet in every direction, in the vain hope he would just bump into Josh.

  “Josh!” he screamed, the sound of his voice competing with the howling of the wind. “Josh, please answer me!” Nothing echoed back to him but the sound of the rushing water and the rustling of the trees in the wind. He didn’t know how long he had been swimming a few feet here and a few feet there. Time seemed to stand still, and all he could hear was the rushing of the water and the howling of the wind. Then he heard it, so faint he wasn’t sure if it was merely wishful thinking.

  “Charlie!”

  Charlie’s heart leapt in his chest. “Jason!” he yelled, lifting one arm out of the water and waving it over his head. A flashlight shone on him, making him squint, and he waved in the direction he’d last seen Josh. “He was over there, but I can’t find him!” He startled as strong arms circled his chest, and he heard Mike’s voice in his ear.

  “It’s okay, man, I gotcha.”

  “Forget about me… get Josh… please get Josh,” Charlie babbled, struggling weakly against Mike’s grip.

  “Don’t make me knock you out, dude,” Mike huffed, his hold tightening as he swam toward the bank.

  “He’s so afraid of the water, Mike… please…,” Charlie trailed off, leaning his head back against Mike’s shoulder as defeat washed over him.

  “It’s okay, Charlie,” Mike soothed, towing Charlie into shallower water. “Tom and Jason are gonna find him. He can’t have gone far. Let’s get you back on dry land.”

  When he had heaved Charlie out onto the riverbank, Mike grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around his shivering body. “Don’t move,” Mike ordered in a firm voice. “I do not want to have to go back in there for you. We’ll find him.” Grabbing another flashlight and some rope, Mike headed downstream.

  Charlie forced himself to his feet, his sopping clothes like ice on his skin as the wind cut through them. He paced up and down, peering into the darkness, trying to follow the line of their flashlights as Mike, Tom, and Jason hunted for Josh. He found himself illuminated in the headlights of the jeep as Maggie screeched to a stop, and Mario and Greg jumped out of the back.

  “Where is he?” Mario grabbed Charlie’s upper arms and shook him. “Where is he?”

  “He was hanging onto a broken tree, but I couldn’t get to him,” Charlie gasped. “The current carried him farther down.”

  Leaning forward so his nose was practically touching Charlie’s, Mario snarled between his teeth. “If anything happens to him, I will kill you.”

  “Mario… this is about Josh,” Greg urged, pulling Mario away and handing him a flashlight from the jeep. “Let’s just find him.”

  “Over here!” Tom’s shout went up from farther downstream. “Over here!”

  Everyone set off at a run, Charlie grabbing onto Maggie’s hand and letting her lead him. Her face was close enough to see the widening of her eyes, but she didn’t say anything—simply gripped his fingers and pulled him along toward the sound of Tom’s voice.

  As he stumbled along behind Maggie, his fist rubbing into his left eye, he repeated over and over in his head like a mantra Please be okay, please be okay. “Oh God” slipped through Charlie’s lips before he could prevent it when they came to a stop next to Tom, who was leaning over a soaking wet Josh on the bank—pressing on Josh’s chest and blowing life-giving air between Josh’s frighteningly blue lips. “No, no, no,” Charlie moaned, dropping to his knees and reaching out a shaking hand to touch Josh’s forehead. He gasped when his fingers came away red with blood, and he paid no heed to the tears that were spilling from his eyes. “Baby, come on, please come on,” he rasped, his fingers slipping into Josh’s cold hand to lift it to his lips. “Breathe, do you hear me, you son of a bitch, breathe!”

  Suddenly Josh coughed and spewed water from his mouth, his chest heaving. Tom grabbed his shoulders and rolled him quickly on his side into the recovery position, and Charlie winced as Josh vomited up what looked like half the river.

  “Okay,” Tom said briskly. “Jason, Mike, go get the stretcher and help me get him on the jeep. Maggie call 911 and tell them to meet us at the main house. Tell them he’s swallowed a lot of dirty river water, his body temperature has dropped, and he’s got a nasty gash on his head. Tell them he wasn’t breathing when I found him. He seems to be doing okay on his own after CPR, but his pulse is still thready.”

  Everyone dispersed and left Charlie clinging onto Josh’s hand as he pressed it to his cheek. Glancing up as Mario dropped to his knees on the other side of Josh, Charlie attempted a half-smile but was met with a stony, accusatory glare.

  “What were you thinking?” Mario hissed through gritted teeth. “Coming out here in the dark alone? You know how he feels about the water, and yet you still brought him out here. Shame you didn’t put Josh’s safety before your dick.”

  Charlie hung his head at the sneer in the other man’s voice and concentrated on trying to warm Josh’s fingers between his. He didn’t know how to respond. Mario wasn’t saying anything he hadn’t already said to himself. He knew this was his fault. If he’d just been man enough to confide in Josh, they would probably have spent the evening curled up on the couch, ending in a warm cozy bed. Not out in the dark where neither of them could see, ending with Josh’s life hanging in the balance.

  “I never took you for a coward, Cooper,” Mario snapped.

  “Mario,” Josh’s voice was faint and cracked, but it was there. “Don’t….”

  “Josh? What are you trying to do? Give me a freakin’ heart attack?” Mario said softly, his fingers carding through Josh’s wet hair.

  “I… wrong way… my fault….”

  Charlie grimaced as Josh coughed up more water and whined weakly in his throat, but he felt relief flow through him when Josh’s fingers tightened on his. He held onto Josh’s hand while the others lifted him onto the stretcher and placed it across the back of the jeep. Throwing Mario a pleading look, he saw Greg g
rab the other man’s arm and push Mario into the front seat of the jeep, before Greg climbed in the back beside Charlie himself. Charlie didn’t blame him. It was probably a good idea to give Mario a wide berth until he had calmed down and they knew Josh was going to be okay.

  When they pulled up to the house in the jeep, the ambulance was waiting for them, along with some of the other campers who’d been awakened by the commotion. Charlie’s heart ached when he heard Rosie’s tiny voice asking her mother if Josh was okay. He wasn’t surprised when Mario shot him a look that told him in no uncertain terms he was not wanted in the ambulance. He watched as Mario and Greg climbed in with Josh and the paramedic slammed the door behind them.

  “Charlie,” Maggie’s voice was quiet as she curled her fingers around his. “Let’s get you inside and in some dry clothes, then Jason and I will take you to the hospital in the jeep. Come on, sweetie. You’re no use to him dripping wet and with pneumonia.”

  “I’m no use to him anyway,” Charlie muttered and allowed Maggie to guide him into the house.

  Fifteen minutes later, Charlie was showered, changed, and sitting in the shotgun seat of the jeep as Jason drove to the hospital in town. He leaned his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. His aching, sore, and useless eyes. He’d put on his spare glasses when he’d dressed, but there wasn’t a lot of difference in his vision. Charlie sighed and swallowed hard. He couldn’t see at all out of the left eye, and through the right all he could see were shadows and shapes—nothing was in focus. He knew this was it. Mario was right. How could he have taken Josh out to the river of all places? He had been led by his dick, by the desire to be alone with Josh far away from any interruptions, by the need to be as close to Josh as possible. All he’d had to do was tell Josh. If he’d told him, they wouldn’t be in this mess.

  “You gonna tell us what happened?” Maggie said softly from behind him, her tiny hand carding through his hair.